Likening motherhood to a crossing guard

By Jill Fales

Congratulations are in order for the Crossing Guard of the Year, Bobbie Papila. (View the link here.) Yesterday, a ceremony was held at her intersection in Lake Forest where she helps kids safely cross the street every day. Honestly, I never knew there was such a thing as a Crossing Guard of the Year, but apparently this is not an isolated case. In one county in Florida there is actually even a Crossing Guard Appreciation Day.

At first I thought it was a bit absurd – Crossing Guard of the Year? But let’s be honest, what could be more absurd than the Academy Awards: treating people like demigods who have several takes to get their job just right (in addition to having a crew to do their hair, make-up and wardrobe). Why not honor those people who only have one take to make sure our kids are safe on the way to school.? But I digress.

I think moms strongly identify with the crossing guard’s plight. Being aware of danger coming from every direction, being responsible for another’s safety is an awesome responsibility. One that is well known to all moms even when our children are in utero.

Unlike crossing guards who report to the same corner every morning, a mom wakes up each day never knowing where motherhood will take her. Keeping our children out of physical harm’s way is only a small part of what we do. Wouldn’t it be nice to able to protect our children from all emotional pain as well?

If we had some sort of real magical stop sign that would allow us to halt all oncoming obstacles, letting our kids go from one part of their life to the next unharmed, would we use it? No backstabbing gossipy girl drama, no bullying for being different, no rejection from the school talent show, not striking out at bat, or having to part with life savings to replace a retainer. It would be a life free of sadness and tears. Getting the lead in all the plays, making every sports team, and receiving an invitation to every birthday party.

Ironically, we know that using a magical stop sign like that would do the most harm of all. Robbing our kids of the opportunity to learn about resiliency, self reliance, and the simple law of nature: life is not fair.

I’m not saying it’s easy. One of the most difficult parts of motherhood is knowing when to put down our proverbial neon vest and stop sign. Sometimes it involves watching in terror as our kids step off life’s curbs without us.

And the age old question about why the chicken crossed the road? I’d like to believe he had a mother who knew when to let him go.

Jill Fales is a contributing writer to The Daily Voice, whose column appears on Tuesday. She is a Costa Mesa mother of four, and runs two websites: www.readinggourmetcafe.com and www.bookwormdirt.blogspot.com.